Im tired of my dads girlfriend.

Im a 17 year old female with BPD. Everyday i wake up to always hearing some sort of shit talked about me and im genuinely tired of it. I cant bring it up to my father because in his eyes she cant do anything wrong, im always the over dramatic one. Today i woke up to her talking about this incident that happened at this birthday party where i was encouraging a little boy to have a good time because the other boys were bullying him and he was crying in his phone. My dads girlfriend stormed over and was like leave him alone and got a weird ass attitude. Now shes shit talking about it to her friends in the kitchen as im typing. Like im not even trying to over exaggerate she talks shit about me everyday and i end up hearing it.

I cant ask her to leave me alone without her starting to yell at me and its not like im telling her to leave me alone for no reason. I only ask when she is about to trigger an episode and i explain to her that its going to happen and she cant handle me asking to be left alone. She cries to my dad that im being disrespectful as she caused an episode because she couldnt stop dogging on me.

Im getting to the point i dont wanna stay at my fathers house anymore. (my parents have joint custody)
And its not like i havent tried telling him about her, he just doesnt listen and thinks im crazy.

Im tired of feeling like everything is in my head when its not. My father is a narcissist and its honestly very hard to live with on top of being a pwBPD. Im tired of explaining BPD to my dad and his girlfriend for them to do the same shit that triggers me. And i admit i can be better with how i am but the way shes been with me for the last 2 years is disgusting.

She just came in my room and asked if i was doing my school work and i am, after telling her that her tone in her voice changed and it was straigh attitude to the point i started crying. She had said didnt your dad tell you to clean your room yesterday which i did. I told her i did and she started getting an attitude and i was honestly like what was the point of that? Do you not hear yourself? The tone you are using? Shes constantly telling my dad im entitled to my feelings but when i feel upset about something she did im overexaggerating. She called me a crybaby for crying but im just tired of the same shit.

She texted my dad saying my room wasnt clean so now my dad called and i tried explaining my side and was instantly met with the im wrong card, that its all in my head, that she didnt have an attitude but i shit you not when i commented on her tone it changed and when on the phone with my dad her tone was totally different. Im so sick of this shit. I was told to get over this invisible vendetta that you have but i cant even explain my side without being interrupted and told to just act right.

I have 2 dogs and one of them peed in the house yesterday and she started getting weird with me and i understand its my job to watch them because they werent home but i went to the bathroom and came out to it. I cleaned it the best i could until my father came home and put together the rug scrubber. But i overheard her talking about snapping out. And to add more to character she shit talks my father infront of us. Calling him a toxic manipulator and even if he is thats not something you say around his children trying to tarnish his image.

Shes put her hands on me which ill be completely honest i took some shrooms. When she found out she had came upstairs and dragged me off my bed by my hair pinned me down and started yelling in my ear as loud as she could.

This post doesnt sum up the shit shes put me through. My parents argued a lot when i was younger and i cant handle yelling due to that factor and she yells at me after ive told her several times to please stop yelling i cant handle the damn yelling.

I see people calling it abuse and im honestly shocked because i never seen it that way.