Seller’s ex-husband is blocking the sale and DIRECTLY emailed us

After over a year of constant touring, waiting for listings, and being outbid, we finally had an offer accepted on a home in our dream neighborhood.

Two days before we were set to close, we got a call from our realtor – he said that the title company was refusing to insure the title because of an issue with the seller’s ex-husband.

What issue? When we submitted our original offer, we noticed that the home had an active right of first refusal. No worries, we thought – it didn’t feel any different than competing against other buyers in our HCOL market. When our offer was accepted 48 hours later, we had thought that the right of first refusal had been taken care of (for any unaware, in this case the right of first refusal meant that the seller’s ex-husband would have the chance to buy the home before us by matching our offer price).

Instead, our agent shared that the title company did not feel confident that the right of first refusal had been observed. The seller’s ex-husband had refused to sign anything or acknowledge receipt of documentation. We then learned that in the divorce agreement, the right of first refusal was vaguely defined without any time limitations.

With the title company stalled, we decided to delay our close. The seller’s agent and lawyer reassured us, sharing that they had decided to take the ex-husband to court to ask that the right of first refusal be waived or more clearly defined. They also briefly mentioned that for some reason, the title company wanted a quit claim deed (even though to our knowledge, we had only seen the seller’s name on all documentation related to the sale up to that point).

A couple weeks into waiting on our new close date, we received an absolutely wild email directly from the ex-husband. Apparently he did receive a copy of our offer, because he took our email addresses from it and proceeded to craft a 10 paragraph essay outlining his interest in the house and his intention to never let it go. He stated that he should not have to pay the full amount of our offer because of some “alternative mechanism” agreed upon during the divorce (we have not seen any documentation supporting this). He accused the seller, her agent, and her lawyer(s) of title fraud, stating that his name should be on the title (even though we have now seen the divorce agreement and it clearly states the home was awarded to the seller). He shared intimate, terrible details of the seller’s alcoholism and other aspects of their personal lives, seemingly to disparage her. And he said that he would stall as long as possible and that we should start seeing other properties.

While alarmed, we decided that we would wait until the hearing date: May 15. The seller’s agent and lawyer rebutted the ex-husband’s email after we forwarded it, sharing that the ex was abusive to the seller and reassuring us that despite his strong language, he would never actually be able to afford to exercise his right of first refusal and purchase the home.

On May 15, we learned that the hearing would be postponed until July 1. We are still not really sure why.

We decided to extend our closing to July 31 and wait one more time. We have the ability to walk away from the sale at any time. While we see the potential in the home and love the neighborhood, I can’t help but feel we are ignoring all the signs that we should walk away. This ex-husband seems obsessive and potentially dangerous. I believe there have been (or are) restraining orders against him.

We’re not even sure who is telling the truth at this point, though in a reasonable world, we would hope that the seller and her team would be in the right and she can finally break free of this person.

Through all of this, the house has been sitting empty.

Anyways, thanks for reading. After such a long time searching plus this ordeal, it feels like we might never own our first home.