My spouse is crying a lot these days post childbirth
Update:
The last couple of days have been better. We are giving expressed milk where possible and taking turns to tend to the baby at night.
I have requested my organisation and manager for a work from home option and they are actively considering it.
My parents are coming on the 19th of March for a month. So that will be helpful too.
Thank you folks for following up on us, grateful with the support. 🙏
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Original post: We had a baby boy 4 weeks back and things are tough. The baby is having feeding requirements every 45 mins and drinks mom’s milk another 30-45 mins. Is this normal?
Secondly, my spouse is crying a lot these days. I understand hormones are at play here but she’s crying for things like baby is crying too much or she’s not able to take care of the baby and so on. I’m trying my best to have her morale up and constantly trying to boost her up. She’s having backache too.
I have my day job and I’m out almost 12-14 hours a day. I’m worried for my spouse. She was so cheerful and zesty all her life. Been together 6 years and this is the first time I’m seeing this version of herself. Should I be concerned? Or is this just something that will heal with time?
Please share your opinions and experiences.
- a concerned spouse and a newly minted dad!
Edits: 1. We have a breast pump. We do try and pump one a day, the lactation consultant suggested no more than once as the baby must be taught the latching and detachment via the natural course.
We have a masseuse lady who comes in and massages the baby and the mum.
She sleeps hardly 2 hours a night: I’m doing 4 hours of sleep a day
Thankfully, household help is available. We have a cook who comes in twice a day and helps with the cooking and a maid, who cleans the house twice a day.
Spouse has been a high achieving corporate employee and for the first time, I see that she is feeling that she’s not in charge or fully in charge of the situation. I’ve tried to explain that we will see better days and to hang on. I’m another corporate slave who’s working so that relative luxury like household help is available.
The baby is just clinging on to the mom. I hold him for a while and he’s good. As soon as we put him to the cradle, he wakes up and cries and wants his mom.
Lifestyle changes: we had frequent weekend night outs, movie dates, short vacations average every 3-4 months. Life has changed since the pregnancy and now more so since the child birth.
We are looking to onboard a nanny. We were waiting for 3 months as it is said that the baby’s neck gets set around that time. We are talking to known folks who have engaged nanny as we hope to have someone with a reference.
Have scheduled a doctor’s appointment, both the paediatrician as well as OB Gyn for Monday!
To all of you who have responded and shared your concerns and thoughts, a huge thanks 🙏