This is what helped me
I just wanted to share my experience in case it might help someone else. It’s also therapeutic. I lost my 18 year old soul kitty about two months ago to cancer. We grew up together, we were kindred spirits, devastated does not even describe it. These things have helped me though in the last couple months ❤️🩹
Talking about it. Finding safe people to share your memories, emotions, and grief. Yes, most people do not understand this is a major life event. But my husband did and he was always there to sit and cry with. Even talking to coworkers and telling them what happened, even if it’s a superficial conversation, helped some. If you can’t talk to someone, writing down your thoughts and feelings. I did just in my Notes on my phone. Getting it outside of yourself helps a little.
Printing photos. Making a scrapbook. I framed my favorite photos, created a little scrapbook. It helped me see how many wonderful memories we had together, they make me smile and tear up every time I look at it now. Also, the last two months of her life were so hard as she got so sick, but physically seeing how little a portion that was compared to all the heartwarming memories made me so grateful for her years together.
Accepting how you feel. Welcoming grief because it comes from love. This was probably the biggest one especially when it is so new and raw. The poem Love Came First entirely changed my perspective. I typed it in the comments.
Putting away major triggers. I could not bear to look at the place where she slept, where she spent her last hours. Once she was gone, I realized she was in every room of the house. Her fur, bowls, toys. My husband cried the entire time cleaning up her things, but we placed them in a special box to keep and cherish.
Opening your heart and home to a new baby. Not rushed, and after allowing time to grieve. I have never felt such intense simultaneous emotions. We adopted a kitten, it’s not the same, it will never be the same, but she has brought so much joy and happiness. All while still crying about how much I miss my baby some nights. It’s ok to feel both. But you don’t deserve to only be miserable. Grief will still be there, we just learn to grow with it.