Drank after 21 years

After 21 years sober, most of it active in AA, I had a drink. What happened? Not much. It was more like sips of a drink at a Christmas party in Mexico. Some kind of liquor. I didn't really like how it made me feel.

About a year later I had a drink, this time the equivalent of one serving of alcohol. I enjoyed the flavor and there was some obsession with that. But it's been a few years now and I have had an eggnog, and infrequent beers (I mean like every few months).

It's not that there is no compulsion to drink more. I can feel that, but it's very distant. It's eclipsed by the fact that I've changed so much during these 20 years that I don't like the way alcohol affects me mentally so have no desire get a buzz or to have more than one.

In general, I don't think about it.

I got sober pretty young but I was absolutely unable to control and enjoy my drinking when I came in. I had a pretty low bottom.

But, it seems like my experience has been a bit different than what I was told it would be like if I drank.

Last night my wife wanted some wine so I bought her some. She asked me if I wanted one and I said no thanks. Again, it's very infrequently where I might join even with a sip.

I genuinely don't want to, not because I'm afraid if I drink I'll have an allergic reaction and lose everything at the end of it.

Now I don't really know what my place is in AA. Could I start to drink alcholicially again, theoretically yes. But I don't like it enough.

It doesn't make sense to me to track sober time because it's a non-issue. I still go to open meetings and another 12 step program for an outside issue.

Am I missing something? Maybe I was just a heavy drinker.